i just recently watched a movie called "little children" and i can't get it out of my head. such a provocative and disturbing movie and it brings up themes that i can strongly relate to.

it's a movie about individuals wanting to fulfill taboo wishes or dreams. the setting is a playground in a suburban, middle class community. two married adults are involved in an affair, a man has pedophile sexual thoughts, another wishes to harm a supposedly dangerous figure in their community. sex, fantasy and murder. all are considered immoral or unlawful, so the individuals will find ways around it. they will come out to play in the symbolic playground and toy with the idea of fulfilling their lust, needs or ill wishes, but when the opportunity to get what they want arises, they run away, back to their safe homes.

perhaps it is the setting of their community that forces them to do what is "right" for society, rather than what they truly want. the neighborhood is stifling, the houses and people ordinary. to quench such a taboo fantasy would be looked down upon. they would be shunned from their people.

perhaps it is the mindset of the individual. deep down, we are scared to do exactly what we wish. our deepest, darkest desires frighten us and even if there is the chance to pursue our wishes, we simply won't do it. we naturally want to retreat to what is accepted and normal. society doesn't confine us, rather, we choose to confine ourselves.

at the end of the movie, the couple involved in the affair did not actually run away together like they planned to. none of the characters actually go out and do what they intend to do. each has gotten hurt in the process of trying to fulfill their wishes. in other words, the adults have gone out to play, but end up scraping their knees so they go back home.

are we all ruled by an unspoken common conscious? are we moral creatures or just fearful? are we too scared to do what we truly want? in the end, are we all just little children in a playground?